Self-harm
Sometimes it can feel like life is just too hard and problems can seem overwhelming. It’s important to sort out the underlying problem—whether it is anxiety, depression or something else. If you are hurting yourself you need to let someone know so they can support you to cope.
Important: If you, or someone you care about, are in crisis and you think immediate action is needed, call emergency services (triple zero – 000), contact your doctor or mental health crisis service, or go to your local hospital emergency department.
What is self-harm?
Self-harm, or self-injury, refers to people deliberately hurting their bodies and is often done in secret without anyone else knowing. Some young people do it once, while others do it to cope with particularly stressful events or as a way of coping over time. When they feel pressured or distressed they may self-harm, so it can become a strategy for dealing with difficult emotions.
The most common type of self-harm among young people is cutting, but there are many other types including burning or punching the body, swallowing dangerous substances or objects, or picking skin or sores. People who deliberately injure themselves are not trying to kill themselves, but instead are trying to find a way to cope with difficulties and distress.
One of the problems with self-harm is it can have physical outcomes such as organ damage and long-term scarring, and may lead to unintended death. It also doesn’t help address the underlying reason for a person’s distress.
Reducing self-harm
If you are harming yourself, try a few of these strategies to replace it with something less harmful, and see if they work for you:
- Try holding ice cubes in your hand or eating a chilli—the cold and heat cause discomfort but are not dangerous to your health.
- Wear a rubber band on your wrist and snap it when you feel the need.
- Use a red pen to draw on the areas you might normally cut.
- Work it off with exercise.
- Scribbling with red pen on a piece of paper.
- Try deep breathing and relaxation exercises.
- Try and focus on something simple around you; watch it for a while and see if that can distract you from the negative thoughts.
- Talk with someone.
- If you find it hard to remember your options, write them down or put them in your phone to refer to when you need it.
Giving up self-harm and developing new strategies for coping with intense emotions can take time. You have to find what works for you. In the meantime, it is important to look after yourself. Get support, talk to your friends, and build things into your life that you enjoy and find rewarding.
Helping a friend
It's not always obvious whether someone is self-harming, but if you're concerned it is important to talk with them about it. Let them know what you have noticed, that you are worried and that you would like to help. It can be a hard conversation at first—what you hear might be a bit scary but if you remain calm, you might have the opportunity to talk more about it and help them through their difficult time.
Remember to listen without judgment, let them know you're there for them and encourage them to seek help. It's also important to take care of your own wellbeing while you're supporting your friend, as it can be emotionally exhausting.
Where to get help
Having supportive people around you is always important. Surround yourself with people that you trust, who will listen to you without judgment and that you enjoy being with. It’s good to work on some things that you can do for yourself, but you don't to have to face this challenge alone. It's important to let others know how you feel when things don’t go to plan. Don’t build up worries, anger or disappointments—talk about them.
A counsellor, psychologist or doctor can help you to work out what is triggering your self-harm, and begin to work with you on managing your difficult thoughts and feelings. Talk to your GP or find a mental health professional.
You can also contact the following helplines:
- beyondblue Support Service
Talk – 1300 22 4636
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Email - Kids Helpline
Talk – 1800 55 1800
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Email - Lifeline
Talk – 13 11 14
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