Myths and facts about child sexual abuse

Here are some of the common myths about child sexual abuse, and the facts to help you understand the reality of child sexual abuse.

Myth: Sexual abuse is most often committed by strangers.
Fact: Sexual abuse is most often committed by someone the child knows.

Myth: People who sexually abuse children look sleazy, cruel or different.
Fact: People who sexually abuse children look like ordinary people. Their abuse can be easy to hide because they look and act like everyone else. They may be relatives, family friends, babysitters, coaches, teachers or neighbours. You can help protect a child from sexual abuse by observing how the child behaves and responds to adults, or by observing the dynamic between the child and adult, rather than by what an ‘offender’ looks like.

Myth: Most children who have been sexually abused will tell someone about the abuse.
Fact: Many children do not tell anyone about the abuse immediately, and others do not disclose for months or years. Many children may also disclose less directly through behaviours or actions.

Myth: All children who exhibit harmful sexual behaviours have been or are being sexually abused.
Fact: Not all children who engage in harmful sexual behaviours have been or are being sexually abused. Children who exhibit these types of behaviours have often experienced multiple types of harm or cumulative harm to their development. They are more likely to have been sexually abused than children who have not engaged in these kinds of behaviours, and are more likely to have experienced other forms of abuse, trauma, disadvantage, neglect or compromised familial, social, and educational engagement. (Meiksans et al. 2017: a-continuum-of-responses-for-harmful-sexual-behaviours-australian-centre-for-child-protection-april-2018.pdf [unisa.edu.au]).

Myth: All children who exhibit harmful sexual behaviours will become adults who sexually abuse children.
Fact: Children who exhibit harmful sexual behaviours generally have a low rate of recurrence of the behaviours and generally do not go on to offend as adults. If these behaviours are addressed early and effectively, they have a high rate of resolution (O’Brien, 2010 Australia's Response to Sexualised or Sexually Abusive Behaviours in Children and Young People [apo.org.au]).

Myth: It's not sexual abuse if a girl doesn't complain or show distress, or if a boy has an erection, in response to sexual stimulation.
Fact: A child’s physical reaction to sexual stimulation means only that their natural body functions are healthy. A child will not understand what’s happening, and it doesn’t mean they’re enjoying the abuse. Sexual abuse is a criminal offence regardless of whether or not it makes the child’s body respond to the physical stimulation

Myth: Children are sexually abused because their mothers are not sexually available to their partners.
Fact: Adults who sexually abuse children and/or young people may have normal sex lives with their partners.

Myth: An offender may be so drunk or high they don’t remember what they did and therefore are not responsible for their behaviour.
Fact: The offender is responsible for their actions, with or without alcohol or drugs.