Tips for young carers
Michael Sheedy, a young carer counsellor at Carers Queensland, shares advice for young carers with Disability Online.
What responsibilities might a young person take on as part of their caring role?
Young carers manage a diverse range of responsibilities, including assisting a person with physical tasks, such as eating and showering, a communication aid in interactions with a GP or other health and support services, assisting the recipient in their medical regime, domestic duties such as cooking meals and helping to assist the recipient in public. The list is often a long one. Layered above these are often other responsibilities, such as managing an academic workload.
How do young carers feel about their caring role?
A lot of young carers I speak with feel a lot of different things depending on their situation, age and what's happening in their life at the time. Sometimes there is a sense of normality in their role-that this is just how life is. There are also feelings of pride. Often they feel their role is very important: that without them the recipient would really struggle. Sometimes there is loneliness due to their isolation and commitment to their role; often anxiety and stress. Furthermore, young carers see their role as a type of catalyst towards an accelerated maturity.
Do young carers feel differently about their caring role at times? Can reaching new milestones, such as starting high school or turning 18, affect the way a young person feels about their caring role? What about changes with the type of care a young carer is required to provide?
New milestones can bring shifts in how the young carer sees and manages their role. For example, adolescence introduces that drive towards independence and self-awareness for the young carer, which may complicate the caring role. High school often brings additional academic responsibilities. The changing health of the recipient may also present new demands on the young carer. All of these contribute towards greater stress within the role.
Is every young carer's experience different?
While there are common aspects to many young carers' roles, how each lives that experience is definitely unique. Included in this experience are a whole set of dynamics faced by young carers and their recipients from a culturally and linguistically diverse (CALD) or refugee background.
How can young carers adjust to changes with their priorities and their caring role over time?
Changes in a young carer's role may include changes in the health of the recipient or the young carer; developmental changes through adolescence; or changes in a practical sense, such as living conditions. These changes can be significant-and may trigger issues around loss, as well as gain. Tapping into a support network can really help a young carer to adjust to these changes, make sense of it all and make reasonable choices around how they manage the process.
What support is available for young carers?
Some of the services that provide support for young carers include Carers Queensland, Young Carers Project, Commonwealth Respite and Carelink Centres, Children of Parents with a Mental Illness (COPMI) and Multicultural Development Association (MDA). These organisations and more aim to provide a range of services and resources for young carers from different backgrounds across metropolitan and regional areas.
Further to these organisations, there are many services available to help address issues related to the recipient's condition, such as Autism Queensland and Open Minds—who include a focus on conditions such as brain injuries. Finally, organisations such as Kids Helpline, headspace and Youthbeyondblue provide important services and resources related to youth mental health.
What support does Carers Queensland offer for young carers?
Carers Queensland supports any young carer aged up to 25 by:
- providing free telephone, face-to-face and group counselling supports
- providing guided referrals to available services
- facilitating the Drive Life Workshops for young carers—a communication skills and strengths building workshop
- facilitating young carer events and activities
- providing a free Young Carers Kit to all young carers who contact us
- producing YC Mail—a newsletter for young carers
- networking with other agencies, such as youth services, schools, health professionals and government, to enhance recognition and awareness of young carers and their roles and needs.
How can young carers set boundaries with their caring role and the support they provide?
Learning to set boundaries often involves developing awareness across different areas with the young carer: What are boundaries? Why have boundaries? How do I go about creating them? How do I know what boundaries are appropriate for me? What are the consequences of boundaries on myself and others?
It can take time to explore, and there are people that can support you to develop healthy boundaries. Contact one of the services available to find out how.
How can young carers maintain a positive relationship with the person they provide care to over time?
There are different ways in which a young carer can maintain a positive relationship with their care recipient. One of the most important things that can help is the young carer taking time to care for themselves and getting a break from the caring role. This often helps to manage stress and may prevent the young carer developing resentment towards the recipient. Learning how to communicate and manage conflict between the two is also important. While there may be some things a young carer finds difficult to discuss with their recipient, trying to develop honest communication is the key. As part of this, I think helping the young carer to learn about the recipient's condition can be significant.
How can young carers access support to help them protect their mental health and wellbeing?
Accessing support often begins with the realisation that, ‘Hey, there is something going on with me, there is support out there and there is something I can do'. Social stigma around mental illness may prevent some young people from openly accessing support; however, there are many options now available via the internet and telephone that provide a level of anonymity. Transport issues may also prevent young carers from accessing support services; however, many service providers will conduct home visits to work around this problem. A responsibility also lies with all service providers to maintain service accessibility and continuity to young carers where possible.
How can young carers develop and maintain positive relationships with friends, family and people in their community?
Social isolation is one of the biggest obstacles for carers of any age. Aside from catching up with people, social media provides important opportunities for young carers to stay connected and socialise with friends and family. Additionally, by staying connected to young carer networks through different service providers, they can maintain awareness of activities and camps for young carers that allow them to share similar experiences with their peers; participate in regulated online forums, like those in U Factor; as well as learn a lot of useful things to help them in their role. In maintaining these different kinds of relationships, they can work to reverse that social isolation experience.
How can young carers protect themselves if they are experiencing bullying, or negative comments, because of their caring role?
In my experience, while some young carers are fairly open about their role, others prefer to keep their role private to avoid being singled out. In protecting oneself against bullying, a young carer can engage in common anti-bullying strategies, such as developing assertiveness techniques. Young carers and their families can also look to connect with teachers and principals to increase awareness of their caring role and develop a supportive relationship with the school that may also help as a protective measure.
Do you have any tips for young carers to help them with goal setting and achieving personal goals and ambitions?
There is a lot of easy-to-access information out there on goal setting, how to set goals and how to achieve them. Personal goals are often considered as part of a life, or long-term, purpose. But, one tip I would add is that often such a purpose may not emerge for some time. Be patient and learn to understand what is important to you and gives you joy in life. Balance this with expectations that others may have of you regarding your ambitions.
Are there any other suggestions, information or resources that you'd recommend for young carers in Queensland?
The one point I would reinforce is the power of a support network. Whether it's a friend, family members, teachers, mental health workers—it doesn't matter. Know that there is a lot of support, information and resources out there at the click of a mouse. The power of support is sometimes underestimated, until it's all of a sudden not there.
